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You know it's good because it's
As advertised on The Mike Malloy Show
on the
Happy Fourth of July!
Of Course there are other days worth celebrating this month:
July 01 - Build A Scarecrow Day (Not Heckle and Jeckle's favorite day.)
July 02 - Visitation Of The Virgin Mary Day (Make sure you serve some nice refreshments. How often does she drop by anyway?)
July 03 - Stay Out Of The Sun Day (Fear The Giant Yellow Orb!)
July 04 - Tom Sawyer Fence-Painting Day
July 05 - Workaholics Day (It's so nice they get a little recognition before their last heart attack.)
July 06 - National Fried Chicken Day (Cholesterol is Your Friend Day.)
July 07 - National Strawberry Sundae Day (None for me thanks … I'll wait until the 12th.)
July 08 - Video Games Day (a.k.a. Time Prepare To Be Wasted Day.)
July 09 - National Sugar Cookie Day
July 10 - Clerihew Day (a very specific kind of short biographical humorous verse i.e.
George "W" Bush
Needed a little push;
When a close recount was expected
The Supreme Court ruled him (s)elected.
July 11 - National Cheer Up The Lonely Day ( I am not making this up. I actually found a website that said: Take a minute today to spend 5 minutes talking to someone who seems lonely.)
July 12 - National Pecan Pie Day
July 13 - Fool's Paradise Day (We're Number 1! We're Number 1!)
July 14 - National Nude Day (I will not be participating this year. Just observing.)
July 15 - Respect Canada Day (How could you not?)
July 16 - International Juggling Day (a.k.a. United Nations Day.)
July 17 - National Peach Ice Cream Day
July 18 - National Caviar Day (You can have my serving … forever.)
July 19 - Flitch Day (Beginning in 15th century monks offered bacon to any married couple who could prove they had lived in harmony and fidelity for one year. Very few "took home the bacon".)
July 20 - Ugly Truck Contest Day
July 21 - National Tug-Of-War Tournament Day (I'm waiting for the video game.)
July 22 - Ratcatcher's Day (Our nation's Unsung Heroes!)
July 23 - National Vanilla Ice Cream Day
July 24 - Amelia Earhart Day (There's a joke around here somewhere …)
July 25 - Threading The Needle Day
July 26 - All Or Nothing Day (I'd rather have nothing than settle for anything less.)
July 27 - Take Your Pants For A Walk Day (Be sure to wear them. This is not July 14th y'know.)
July 28 - National Milk Chocolate Day
July 29 - Cheese Sacrifice Purchase Day (Does it mean that we buy some cheese and sacrifice
it, or does it mean we aren't allowed to eat cheese today, as a sacrifice?)
July 30 - National Cheesecake Day (Well at least we can celebrate it's not the 29th.)
July 31 - Parent's Day (Oh g'wan … Splurge and buy 'em some cheese.)
Questions?
